"He was the first man to ever turn me on. When he flipped my switch and lit me up that first time, I knew he was it for me. There would never be another.

It was unfortunate, then, that he didn’t even notice me. Sure, he appreciated my usefulness but he never really saw me when he was using me. To him, I was just another tool.

Before you get too hard on him, though, I should tell you something about myself. Something important.

I am a lamp.
Yes, you read that right.
A lamp.