“We’ll need a bucket,” Gurd said, taking off his pants.

Karla never dreamt she’d meet an actual orc. Orcs don’t exist. They aren’t dangerous and powerful, with fists that might squeeze the life out of a hippo, not to mention a frail human. Their essence certainly isn’t, well, abundant – and also green and smelling deliciously nutty…
OK, fine, they exist. One is standing right there. Smelling nutty.
But even though he fills her with longing, Karla’s certain no orc in his right mind will go around lusting after her, a curvy woman suffering from adult acne, right? It’s impossible.
Well, guess what?
Gurd the Orc is in Karla’s bedroom, more than ready to conquer her with his green sword. And he’s asking for a bucket because you know what happens when an orc comes.
Karla’s carpet might never be the same after this.