How To Accidentally Turn Your Hot Biker Neighbour Into a Full-Time Obsession

Posted by Anonymous at 1:02 a.m.

April 2

Here's something they don't cover in "Surviving Your Twenties 101": What to do when your new neighbour is six foot four of dangerous biker wrapped in tattoos and silence.

Spoiler: you lose all chill.

Exhibit A: Jake Savage

* Hot. Silent. Deadly
* When he talks, my brain forgets how to brain.
* His arms exist, and I was not warned.

Exhibit B: Me

* Normal coder girl, thriving on coffee and spreadsheets.
* Now googling things like “is it normal to want to lick your neighbour’s biceps” at 1 a.m.
* Wondering if forearm worship is a recognised religion.

My life used to be predictable. Now it’s a three-step cycle:

1. Jake exists.
2. I obsess.
3. Repeat.

And then, when he kisses me? Full system crash. 404: Not Found.

So yeah. Dating Jake wasn’t in my five-year plan. But apparently, it’s the crash course I signed up for.

Heads up: dating a biker comes with no guidebook and no safety net. There’s just him and the ride, and all you can do is hold on tight.

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P.S. Before you panic, this isn’t going on my public blog. I’m not trying to get unalived or sued, thanks. I’ve set this journal to private. Think of it as a spiral log for Future Therapy Me. If I ever make it public, I’ll be redacting names, affiliations, and any detail that could get me yeeted into a ditch.

The Girlfriend’s Guide to Dating a Biker is a laugh-out-loud, steamy biker romance with a broody, bossy biker who doesn’t do small talk, only obsession; a nerdy coder heroine who’s just as gone for him; and enough banter-charged tension to make you also wonder why forearm worship isn’t a recognised religion. If you love hilarious heroines, found family, and protective bikers who kick down doors instead of knocking—welcome to the ride.